ĤØŴ ᓰ Ᏸ𝔼Ⓒค𝓂ᗴ å вᵒ𝓎

Vic Brooks

Before the cut
I was as full as I could be 

with two bodies in-utero
about to roll off the tongue like mx

a surgeon either side of me
bakers in blue clattering knives

one nods to me over the top of the sheet
we’re about to start the violence

sinking their arms into me
kneading god’s own bread

pushing at the base of my lungs
I swallow and stare at the light

The anaesthetist charges my drip
as I ask, how is this legal?

my loves are placed on my chest
of all places 

as the surgeons
stitch me a flesh quilt

The next day
I could barely stand, but I did

in front of a mirror
of all places

dried blood and sweat
swollen breasts leaking masculine

catheter and plastic pants
unable to shit

a step closer and I looked them in the eye
yes, I am him—I can see that now

I am a day old

Vic Brooks is a duplicitous queer gender-shifter writer living in London, and parent to an octopod (small identical twins). Their novel, Silicone God, was published by MOIST Books (UK) and House of Vlad (US). Find their essays, short fiction and poetry in The Philosopher's Magazine, Wrong Directions, Midcult, Archer, t’ART, W0rms, SAND, and elsewhere. They are on Instagram @vics_double_trouble